My time as an artist is goneposted Jul 28th 2011, 2:37AM
Mood: Depressed
i've been having a rather rough time as of lately battling depression and all, latest news to come in is that apparently i have wasted a year and a half in my fine art and drawing course because my work is not art. My teachers believe that my work is not art because comics and cartoons is not what art is and that i'd be better off going to a design and illustration course. They are probably right, mind you not about my work not being art, i fail to see how it isn't art, but i probably would be better off transferring to somewhere where i am appreciated more than this. I'm sick and tired of being handed vague bullshit i can't use at my school, it all started last semester when one of the teachers said my work is naive and childish and now she says this.
Apparently what is required from me is that i should be looking at 'real' artists and not comic 'drawers' that draw cartoons which do not classify as art. Now when they asked to hear my side of the story and what i think of course i collapsed, i'm horrible when my emotions are in the shitter and that didn't put me in a good position to talk straight. To be fair, i could learn more about the 'real' artists they mentioned, but i think to assume that my work has no artistic value is a bit harsh, they say it looks nice and that it is pretty and all but i'm studying fine art and that my work has no place in a fine art course. They liked the portraits because it has something to do with classic portraiture, but comics has nothing to do with the art world according to them, it's more illustration and design.
I may be over reacting a bit here, but it feels like i am no longer welcome at my course anymore, the teachers say that i am welcome to study further in the course, but i can't help but feel that after they said all that about my work not being art and that i'd be better off going to design or illustration that it's kind of them trying to make them seem decent. Like being kicked in the balls and then they pat me on the back saying "we're not the bad guys here, you just bought this on yourself and you're a horrible person" I don't know, i have till the weekend to gather 5 'real' artists and books of real artists by the end of the weekend and have a collection of work by myself that is actually 'proper' art. Personally i just feel drained and don't see the point anymore.
I talked to this to some of the people i know and donna's father said that he's outraged, he personally agrees that maybe i am better off in design or illustration, but he's furious that they'd wait till my course was half finished to tell me this and he's worried about whether or not i am going to get any credit for it. Mind you, thus far i have been passing the whole course, i haven't failed a single subject yet, so to be told now that my work isn't art and that i'd be better off doing a different course is rather a shock and a low blow.
However, that being said, i am considering changing courses for a few reasons. number 1: most of the people here seem like brick walls to me, student wise, however that could be partially my fault as i am not at my studio all the time and have had bad experiences trying to talk to people with what getting weird looks and all, i just preferred to work at home, i'd be doing the workload required but apparently i'd be better off not doing the course at all according to my teachers which may be a valid point, i should be spending more time with the other students. The reason why it'd be good to change is maybe i'd meet more people that i could actually get along with for a change, my social life would improve and i'd be happier. 2: During my time here i liked to complain about what the teachers would want me to do half jokingly, but over time shit has gone out of control, one of the teachers last semester said my work was naive and childish, not exactly constructive critique. Now i'm being told my work isn't art and that i'm at fault for not talking to one of the teachers on a regular basis as he was one of the markers, i didn't think i'd have to talk to him as i didn't have him specified for any group tutorials. It'd be nice to be able to work somewhere where i can get some actual critique, earlier in the year i was told to use better paper and change mediums, i have done both of those, then i get "your work is childish" "cartoons aren't art" and "i'm sorry, but i don't think you belong in this course"
Quite frankly i'm a mess right now, i'm hurt, shattered, angry, pissed off, a whole variety of emotions, i know i owe you some things like requests and all, but i need to get my shit in order first, i'd like to figure out what my options are, there is a very good chance that my life as an 'artist' is over because apparently there is no artistic value in something cartoony, oh, my bad, there is something of artistic value in cartoons, just not in the cartoons i'm doing, it's just that my work specifically isn't artistic in anyway. Bleh.
Hey, the name is Sandwich, i'm a full time student and I love to draw and Animate, I continue to try and learn new things about myself and my drawings, lately i haven't been able to do a lot of animating, but hopefully that will change with the end of the year coming closer to a close.
doing alright, being much more active on here, and hoorah, i just moved, so that means i have my scanner back, which means i can finally upload any future drawings i do looking forward to posting more stuff. Other than that i'm doing peachy, just got a few holes in my life that need fixing, the harder ones to fix will be getting a job and a licence <_<
ah. same here... getting my drivers(guessing thats the liscense) liscense was a bitch... took me like 5times D: and i still don't have a job. you don't live in the USA right?
And yeah. my family was pretty supportive but it sucked. I kept getting failed for silly reasons. One of them my grandmother psyched me out so bad i drove on the wrong side the road.
D'oh. The lady that passed me said i hadbeen failed so much i was getting over cautious and almost failed because of that. The DMV made me into their worst enemy. :3
wow, to get our learners we don't have an actual driving test, more like a theory test, to get our P's we have our driving test, however i'm still on my L's and i'm 20.. Anyway, i kept failing the theory test because there was a section where you would have to look at images of a car turning then tell which had the right of way. The only problem was on the practice you could make out everything as clear as day, but the images on the computer for the test was kinda crappy and things were a lot more vague, hence why i failed a lot, you only had to get one of those questions wrong to fail, and i always only got one wrong xD
its not too bad. DMV's are just very very silly... once i got my liscense it was so different. If one of the test givers saw me now they'd probably auto fail me... not to mention all my anxeity went away when i didn't have someone in the car with me 8D
that's actually the case with a lot of full licence drivers, that after they pass they'd probably fail the test many years into the future and be considered unworthy of having a licence if they took the same test teenagers took today xD
i always take public transport, basically my uni is about half an hour to an hours train ride, means i can do a lot of reading to and from uni when i'd otherwise be drawing (can't draw for shit on trains <_<
that's okay, you can have as long as you want to sort out the issues i your life, hop things get better for you. Your life should come first over comments on sheezyart :3
If it helps(as i'm not sure who knows this) I am real life friends with both sunshine and sarah.(Sarah being the one to get me to come to SA ) sooo that should shed a bit morel ight on issues
yeah by what i can tell about sarah and her bf.. that things can get rather difficult, specially in sarah's case (not a fan at all about how her father operates as a father figure)
Well anyway, i'm glad to hear that things have semi resolved, keep being there for your friends irl, that is all.
oh god. yes it can... the recent drama is just insane X.x at least college'll keep me away from it. (nor am i, but he is pretty cool sometimes... he's just odd... that and the divorce killed him, not excusing what he did but yeah... it at least puts logic behind this)
Yeah, definatly true. i'm glad thingsa re resolved and of course i'll always help them
yeah, i can assume a number of things from the situation at hand.. because well i don't know what the hell is going on with you all, all i know is that darkryuukin broke up with sunshine (or vice versa) and that's about it. ... ... ...Is darkryuukin actually a super secret super hero from outerspace?!
I know ^^ Its why i said it o.o cause it doesn't sound highschooly so i was happeh
I can esplain it a bit better. Darkryuukin(Sarah) broke up with STB(Kyle) after having some feelings, I, along with a mutual friend of all of ours and her parents helped her not flipflop on the decision(as that usually isn't such a good idea in a relationship... ya know? Cause its bandaid fix D:) and well, because i personally have been in love with sarah, kyle kinda blames me for all of it and thinks i stabbed him in the back and lied to him...(despite not talking to me about it D:) i've tried to explain i did what i did as a friend and that i had no intention of pursuing her so soon after they broke up(and probably not at all if kyle had not been ok with it) but well.. he still thinks i backstabbed him. At the moment i'm going into college as a freshman and well... can't deal with this. If he comes around he comes around... i can only do so much. He has good reason to think i backstabbed him, but it was from someone who was in emotional shambles and misinterpreted my words. That and well, she kinda lead me on and then got back together with him the first day of highschool... so emotions are running a bit high. I'm not sure what to do, but i don't think theres much i can do. I try to help, but i can't help everything i guess.
huh.. i had a feeling it was exactly that, but i don't like to make assumptions, assumptions usually end badly or just end up being wrong xD Anyway, i seriously hope that things that get better for you, sarah and kyle. nothing much else i can say other than that unfortunately.
I don't blame you, assumptions often are mis-steps. Hence the big problem here. D: I'm not gonna ask for sympathy, just well... hoped to shed some light on why things are so odd.
Yeah, i hope things get better for us as well, i worry for the both of them so much more then they realize. I can deal with this emotional shit, i don't think they'll be able to. unfourtnatly.
As for not being able to say more? don't worry, you don't have to at all. Just wanted to let you know what was going on and why the three of us have been so odd.
yeah and i totally understand now as to why things would be so odd, it sucks when relationships or friendships can become such a hassle but they do unfortunately. I just hope things will clear up and kyle will understand.
awesome! I'm glad i'm awesome enough to be recieving a watch from you, just don't make it the edward patterson kind of watch.. that would be kind of creepy..
the more people to talk to the better = the more time you spend checking your emails
mwuhahahaha, the ultimate time waster
ah okay, well i honestly can't be stuffed really getting into the community that much, i'm fully fine with people messaging me and having conversations with me, but otherwise i can't put myself through the effort to comment on other peoples things
Yeah the community is weird... i'm not into it much either(being a writer D:) but yeah i like talking to the random awesome people.(mostly found through Sarah and such.)
oh? i never really have a social network when it comes to youtube, the worst i do with youtube is maybe watch videos now and then and waste a lot of time watching pointless videos, however other times i put it to good use and watch some more educational videos.
how is the community weird exactly? being one that doesn't actively get involved with said community i don't know what it's really like. what i know so far is that there are some cool people with the occassional closed minded person that thinks that they are right no matter what and refused to talk to me when i mentioned an artist that put up three blank canvases as art in a gallery to question what is art. The guy took quite an offense when i said that to and took it rather personally.
oh thats what i meant, its a time waster cause of all the videos I'm also wasting time by trying to beat metroid prime without saving(really really hard D: hate not having a memory card... got to the second to last area and bit the dust because of a boss i had no idea how to defeat started attacking me)
Yeah pretty much that, there are some awesome people here... but overall there are just people that i have no idea... writing is frowned upon here(not sure why) as is photography... once again not sure why. Coming from someone who can't draw at all(i have rather bad fine motor skills, and early failures have led me to not having a drive to get better, but meerly appriciate others ability) it sucks, because i deal in writings and phorography and such. I put a picture up here, and it got reported by someone who reported me because it happened to her... pure revenge on someone she didn't know -.- I still don't have a good reason as to why i got a warning from it(i try to avoid doing things that would do that, goody two shoes to the core) but yeah it didn't end up well. D:
So yeah, up down side to side... odd community but the people i talk to are pretty awesome.
argh, that reminds me of the challenge they had on the back of the final fantasy 7 case, where they challenged you to beat the game without a memory card. I'm thinking "psh as if.. took me 60 hours in total to finish that damn game WITHOUT a memory card T_T"
argh.. i've never been reported thus far. I dunno when it comes to photography people tend to frown upon the facebook/myspace photos where tween girls snap photos of themselves at arms lengh, then send their army of vanity shots across the interwebs. But if it's not that ten they are assholes, on the other hand i've had a few of my drawings rated down for whatever reason that i can't be sure of. But that doesn't really matter, yu get over it, there is always an asshole on the interwebs.
yeah exactly D: Metroid is a short game(about 6 hours so i could) but if i die i have to start over(cause they expect you to save ) I did beat the new spyro game(the shit one) without a memeory card(one reason it was terrible D: way too easy)
Yeah... thicker skin i need. I guess i just don't like to have those blemishes. I'm learning more and more the community doesn't like photography/writing(which is all i do ) I just can't believe i seriously got reported over a picture of a cover of a chemitry book O.o of all the things
i only remember playing the first spyro game, i found it rather enjoyable, didn't play of the ones after that. I remember playing the original crash bandicoot, those were some good memories.
pay no attention to it, people can be asses, i don't see anything wrong with literature or photography. Only issue with literature and myself is that i have a short attention span and usually can't muster up the power to read stuff like a poem, specially on a screen. ISsue with photography that really doesn't matter is that i don't know much about it, hence i can't critique it, same applies with literature, i don't write much on an artistic level, so i can't critique it as well as i do drawing. I guess i have a preference to drawing and animation because i understand it and can critique it. Or it could be something else, not sure to be honest.
They were great till insomniac stopped making them... then other companies got ahold of the liscense and its now in quite an awful place....
Yeah. i've learned that. Unfourtnatly back then i wasn't so... thick skinned and i took it rather hard :( Posted a bunch of angry journals(that i deleted for good measure) Though i got the photography cast member to post on one O>O( whatever cast members are. They have stars so they seem important)
Yeah i think thats why people don't read things. But it seems more people read literature then poems... which makes no sense as poems are usually shorter(my poems tend to be really short ) I like poetry because it is so emotionally involved. and well... grammar. D:
i miss some of the older games, like the old spyro and whatnot, they were great, actually one game i really liked was this one where you'd ride on a maic carpet and you had to collect balls of mana to fuel your magic and you had to kill mythical creatures and other wizards on carpets
yeah, well you learn over time to just get used to it and ignore it i guess. Some people here can be total assholes and i guess that's just the facts. As one comedian puts it "there's always one asshole on the internet"
well the thing with poetry is that it requires a certain level of thinking, it's good and all just to read it, but it requires some effort to understand the meaning behind it or to make your own meaning from the words used. Literature as a whole doesn't require that much effort to read, however the extra lengh in general literature is a downside in itself images are good in that you can see it then and there. Although some artists will claim that in order to really appreciate an image you have to sit there for a while and take it in.
Oh insomniac... yeah i'm a retro gamer as well. Like some of theo lder games(though lives PISS ME THE FUCK OFF. cause i have save states but i don't want to use them cause it feels cheep but its just less time runnin around a map screen(trying to beat donkey kong country) )
Yeah. there's always multiple assholes on thei nternet. Sadly i wasn't as thick skinned as i am now... its why i deleted the journals, never gonna care again. :(
Rofl. There has gotta be more to art, i know sarah at least has a ton of hidden meanings. With the poems that i write, they should be fairly straightforward, as i write to express my soul and mood at the time, how i feel and why i feel that way. I write poetry as a release.
hehe, i remember listening to some sonic remixes that featured part of a playthrough of the final stage on sonic and knuckles. And on the bottom left of the screen.. or the top left (can't remember) it said that the amount of lives he had was 84 and that got some reaction from the youtube audience
well it shouldn't mean that you shouldn't care about anything, you should just be weary of assholes on the internet, and that most likely any real negative comment save for critique is most likely the work of trolls.
that's the thing though, art can be simply just about aesthetic or it can be about something more, it can be just for the sake of art, or it can reflect on humanities process as a whole. It depends on the individual and their take towards art. For me it differs depending on what i draw. Sometimes i can draw something purely for aesthetic and nothing else. Sometimes i draw just to provoke a laugh and draw for entertainment. However sometimes there is the occassion that i try and put some kind of message through my art (which alternatively is the least popular of all the art I ever do) I suppose as a whole people in general aren't interested in seeing some kind of deep message, they seem to be content to be entertained by something as shallow as they are.
Thats what i meant, not that i'm completly going to ignore everything, more that i just don't care as much.
Hmm. Deep. quite deep ^^ definatly made me think of art in a whole new light, thats for sure. Same with writing though, my poems are all written for different emtions. in fact a good way to tell my emotions is to read my writings. Back when i was in dispair i wrote about sucicide(not like i'd ever go through with it thuogh ) when i was in fear i wrote about courage and such. i don't write for comedy too much though O3o though i did write for cute once (the art of the pess-optimist, go check it out its short ^^)
unless it took you 82 tries to finish the final boss on sonic?
and that's a good way to go about it, trolls just want some attention like the sad fools they are.
be sure to read other peoples poems so that you can take some of their ideas into your future works, applies for every art form. you have to take a look at the art surrounding you, absorb it like a sponge so that you can gain new ideas from them.
Submit Artwork 
Manage Artwork 
Manage Journal 
Messages 
Watch List 
Settings 
Logout 
Upgrade 
Artwork
Watchers
Profile
Comments
looking forward to posting more stuff. Other than that i'm doing peachy, just got a few holes in my life that need fixing, the harder ones to fix will be getting a job and a licence <_<
, it was a guess.
.gif "Nudge nudge, wink wink ;)"){kind=small}
